I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
