is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
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