it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I understand Curling. That high.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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