She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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