I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
