well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
You peed on a flamingo?!?
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize