Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
