After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
