So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I need to align my fucking chakras
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