sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
