remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
