Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
