I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I could fuck to npr.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
