plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
