Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
