You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
