Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
