Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
