But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
