I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Sext me about skeletons
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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