My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
We are all done wearing pants today
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Randomize
