they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
