My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
