We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
it hurts more in the daytime
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Randomize
