I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
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