Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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