batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
