Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
She announced her abortion via fbk
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
