Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
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