yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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