okay pat passed out under dana's car
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
