Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
