Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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