it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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