Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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