i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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