VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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