she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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