i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
