dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
