this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
