If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
