Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
