Whoa Z and x make the same sound
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
