are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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