I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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