the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
