nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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