I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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