i think i have herpe
just one?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
